Review by Lyndsay Parker
When it was announced that "American Idol" Season 12's first live
results show, on which the top 10 finalists would be revealed, would be a
full 90 minutes long, I assumed that meant there'd be some wiggle-room
for a few Wild Card performances. I mean, how else was Nigel Lythgoe going to pad an entire hour and a half?
Oh, but I should not have doubted Fox's ability to find new ways to make a process that could have been completed
in five minutes feel like five hours. No, people, there were no Wild
Cards on this Thursday's semifinals results show. There was, in fact,
just a top 10. And every single one of the top 10, upon hearing their
good news, did a victory song. Every. Single. One. Of. Them.
And then each contestant was critiqued by the judges, just to kill more time--except the singers weren't really
critiqued, since having Nicki Minaj say, "That wasn't it, ladybug," or
Randy Jackson exclaim, "Dawg, that was a mess!" probably would've sucked
the wind right out of the contestants' sails and made their victory
performances seem, well, much less victorious.
So basically, this episode featured so much filler, it might as well have been sponsored by Juvederm.
Perhaps I should not complain. I mean, we all, at least hypothetically, watch "Idol" to see people sing,
right? But after two back-to-back, 120-minute "Idol" episodes filled
with singing this week, another hour and a half really was overkill. The
contestants should have just saved these performances for next week.
And then, of course, there was the issue that not all of the best contestants, in my opinion,
made it through this Thursday. Disgruntledly I endured one
disappointing performance after another, while I waited to find out if
my favorites were safe--but unfortunately, a few male contestants that I
was really rooting for (Elijah Liu, Nick Boddington, poor little
Charlie Askew, even Vincent Powell) were sidelined by the bland Paul
Jolley, the sweet but not-quite-ready-for-prime-time Lazaro Arbos, and
Charlie's former Hollywood Week nemesis, showboater Curtis Finch Jr. The
amazing Burnell Taylor was the only boy I was truly excited to see in
the top 10, and he's the only one I'd like to see at this May's "Idol"
finale.
This is why there should have been Wild Cards this season,
Nigel. And shame on you, Randy, for stringing viewers (and contestants)
along by hinting that there would be Wild Cards. Boo.
Thankfully, the girls' bunch was much stronger. But due to the show's
stupid gender quotas (and aforementioned stupid lack of Wild Cards),
there wasn’t room for all of the great female singers this
year, which meant marketable potential pop stars like Breanna Steer and
Aubrey Cleland--both of whom would've been better additions to the top
10 than a couple of the boys who did make the cut--were sent home.
But we will see two of these singers again: At the end of
the episode--when the end finally, mercifully arrived--Ryan Seacrest
announced that next week there will be a singoff between the male
contestant and female contestant who narrowly missed making the top 10,
and the winner of that singoff will get to go as a bonus 11th contestant on this summer's Idols Live concert tour. But will any concertgoers even want to see that tour? I'm not so sure. While this season's cast has some real talent--a top three comprising Candice, Burnell, and Kree would be awesome--I still think this may be "Idol's" worst, or at least most boring, top 10 ever. (Season 9, all is forgiven…)
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